Being a teacher is hell.

NUMBER 1 Reason they deserve a raise

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Have you ever spent anytime with these people?

Ages 9-13 is a hellscape.

Anybody who teaches Middle School deserves a million dollars a semester.

I substitute taught Middle School when I was in college and every day was the new worst day of my life.

NUMBER 2

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Can you imagine grading this stuff?

You go home at night to watch The Pioneer Woman, not to read some wiener kid's thoughts on Where the Red Fern Grows.

This is soul-crushing labor.

NUMBER 3

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Every teacher should be given a paddle, just like the old days (or current days in Mississippi).

We're talking about post-pubescent young adult students who are being deprived of Pokémon and Tik Tok for EIGHT HOURS!

Watch your flanks.

This guy should be given a six month leave to Barbados.

NUMBER 4

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Every third kid in my junior high smelled like Bill Laimbeer.

NUMBER 5

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The last person to realize their kid is a turd is mom and dad.

You're job, as a teacher, is to break that news to them delicately during parent-teacher conferences.

NUMBER 6

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Based on the TV shows I watch, the principal is always trying to be the "good guy".

We don't need that.

We need a dictator who throws the book at these maniacs.

Leave the "I play Minecraft too!" approach to the weirdo science teacher.

NUMBER 7

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You spend hours preparing a rousing lecture on polynomials, and the kids are looking down at their Tinders for the whole period.

Who can compete with an iPhone?

Let's get these heroes a raise please.

We need them on that wall...

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